#WeekendCoffeeShare: Learning How To Understand Your Romantic Interest
Have you ever wondered what goes on in the mind of your crush without stepping on eggshells? After days, months, and even years in some cases something about that person makes you want to understand them more. Learn what puts a smile on their face and what ticks them off (so you don't do it).
To some the thought of dating has changed with all the new dating apps that is supposed to make it easier. However, getting back to the basics of dating seems like a far shot of lessons that are rarely valid. Now that the weather is becoming cooler (on average depending on where you are) whether you are single, in a relationship, or married it is safe to assume that the thought of being with your crush/romantic interest/significant other will cross your mind at some point.
For me personally I took a step back from dating for a little while. Not because I didn't have any options (no I am not a player), but because I wanted to become a better me before stepping into the realm of dating again. In turn, understanding myself and what I desire in a relationship helped me take a different approach to the next romantic interest I have.
So what are the fundamentals here for this fall season?
What are their favorite/non-favorite things
Now and days many individuals tend to jump the gun. Their romantic interest/crush may just be the one for them. Before a relationship franchise tag is even agreed upon, the mere thought of what life could be like with them consumes their mind.
What is their favorite color? What is the one movie that they can watch on repeat without ever getting tired of and quote as if they wrote the entire script? What city/state/country do they enjoy visiting at any moment? How about their favorite food to eat? Are they more comfortable with summer weather that allows them to wear t-shirts and shorts/bathing suits? Or do they enjoy wearing sweaters/hoodies in fall/winter weather? (Which they may end up wanting/taking your sweater so even when you are not around when they wear it, it still gives them a sense of your presence.)
You can also apply their non-favorites to the latter questions as well.
What does home feel like to them?
The definition of home does not have to be recognized in the literal sense of a home or apartment. The feeling of home in a relationship can be interpreted as what makes them feel safe. Small (but intimate) actions such as holding your hand and knowing you are there can mean more than you think to them. Being in a crowded public area and catching their eye from a distance giving them the feeling that no matter how many people are around, just the look (or smirk) makes it feel as if you two are the only ones that matter to each other. These things/actions is what makes your partner feel at home in a relationship no matter where you are.
Creating traditions with each other
Two of my favorite things to do is cook and travel. When I put myself on the market these are interests that I want to share with my girlfriend as well.
Contrary to the whole traditional "women belong in the kitchen" jargon is not something I care to follow. I'm a chef and I have no problem being in the kitchen for hours as she sits back and watches her favorite show on Netflix. In turn, I think cooking and being a chef works in my benefit. We can cook our breakfast/lunch/dinner with each other. What's more romantic than spending quality time with your significant other cooking and then enjoying the meal together?
When it comes to traveling this does not necessarily mean places that are clear across the country. You two can visit a local sight with beautiful scenery 30 minutes away and it be just as meaningful as flying thousands of miles away from home. Whether it is a weekly, monthly, or annual trip that you both take together, in this case it really is the thought that matters. As long as you both are together anything can be your tradition.
Now these are not things that you have to follow to the T just because of my own suggestions. All relationships are not the same. You can definitely tweak them to how your relationship works. At the end of the day, the core principles of a great relationship are more than just the "honeymoon" phase of happiness.
Once you finally get the person of your dreams you should always want to keep learning and understanding them. Just like from an academic standpoint, you may never learn everything in a particular subject and it definitely won't happen over night. Nonetheless, the journey is a marathon that you want to go on with that person forever... not a 100-meter sprint that has a quick ending.