The Definition of a Racial Slur Does Not Change With Skin Color

For the life of me, I do not understand how this common sense logic is not recognized, but I will say my thoughts on it anyways. Society is becoming downright ignorant in believing that because of some unwritten rule the definitions of racial slurs change depending upon your skin color alone. I'll speak on behalf of the N word that I literally grew up with and apparently have the rights to say at will.

I will not paint myself as some angel here. Growing up as a kid my peers (generally in middle school and high school) using the N word was common. Yes I used the N word as a term within phrases such as "hey what's up friend" and "this n**** is too funny!* At the time of that childish/illogical mindset, it was okay for me to say just because I was (and still am obviously haha) Black/African-American. 

Once I grew up into my own as an adult (plus mindset) and ultimately out of that urban environment, I began to realize my idiotic mistakes. Although I thought using the word in a good manner was okay, in all actuality it is not. The N word was created simply to demean slaves and blacks/african-americans during slavery times. That is the basic way of explaining it without having to be technical. 

As I began to go cold turkey and not use the word at all, it became apparent that society as we know was too late in using logic. By unwritten rules, since my skin color is what we technically define as "black" I can use the word whenever I feel like it positively or negatively. However, anyone who has white skin (European descent skin tone if you will) uses the N word at all in any way shape or form, unless accepted by some unofficial board of blacks/african-americans members (that does not really exist) they will be deemed as racist.  

Personally, I have come to logical terms a long time ago that no word in existence has a definition change based upon the skin color of who says it. You can literally exchange the N word with any other racial slur and I would think the same exact way (excluding having first hand experience of course). 

Obviously people will think illogically about the N word's definition being changed to something great (even though people still use the N word when demeaning/talking bad about anyone of any race... like the original definition specifically towards blacks/african-americans). 

To each their own when it comes to racial slurs in general. I wish people would stop using them all together, but that may never happen (at least in my lifetime). I have some friends who still use the word to me in the same "hey what's up my friend" manner and that's cool. I know they mean goodwill, so even when I don't agree with them using the word, I know that is how we were raised and I know their good meaning behind it. 

What do you all think about racial slurs and the fact society in general actually think the definition changes based upon skin color/race association?